Thank me later

My last column. Am I happy? Am I sad? My uncertainty leads me to believe that it lies somewhere in between those two words or emotions that are tossed around so loosely today, that I don't know if I can truly comprehend their meaning.
Then again, there aren't many certainties in today's world. What will be the denouement in the Trumaine Johnson vs. USD saga that has taken a backseat to end of semester distractions? Will USD ever establish a fan base or will we just have a student body that shows up the for the Gonzaga game? Is becoming a legit mid-major power even a realistic goal for this school?
             
To be as frank as possible, I don't know the answer to these questions, but the fact that they are being raised brings attention to the lack of fan support at USD. Having the antithesis of a loyal fan base here has watered down my college experience. I am just grateful I got a taste of how college basketball should be experienced when the Toreros defied conventional wisdom, stooped oddsmakers and finally beat Gonzaga. That was actually worth my family's $48,000 a year, I think.
             
Speaking of our school's "sport," I wonder where Torero basketball will be four years from now? I hope this new 2010 recruiting class is as exquisite as advertised. But I wouldn't be surprised if at least of one of them does their best William Costigan Jr. impression and departs the team for butting heads with Torero hierarchy. 
             
I think my sense of pessimism is a love child of my presence on campus during USD Athletics' golden era, and the recent loss of sanity I have endured as a graduating senior. To be strolling 5998 Alcala Park when USD basketball was still battling in March, when Josh Johnson was toying with defenses and when Brian Matusz was throwing flames at Cunningham stadium, had me feeling like a trust fund baby. I was spoiled.
             
This taste of success we felt here instantly bred an environment of unrealistic expectations. Did we really expect the Toreros to be one of those 64 teams for the second year in a row? Were we going to be blessed with another Josh Johnson in what became the laymen defect Sebastian Trujillo?
             
What's my point? How come I am not writing a generic farewell column that gives thanks to those in my life? It's because I want USD to be a school that isn't mistaken for UCSD, or that other school where a bunch of genius frat boys got caught for selling narcotics. It's because I want people to know what color Torero blue is, it's because I want to walk into a Lids outside of Southern California and find a Torero fitted. It's because I want USD students to wake up and really start supporting their teams to attract great athletes to our school.